lie LIFE RELATIONSHIP truth values


Is there any difference between – Harmless and harmful ‘lies?’

Last night I was at my balcony waiting for the odour of the insecticide I used in the rooms to vanish, when I overheard my neighbor speaking to someone over the phone –
“I am in presently in Abuja and will be back in a week’s time… Don’t worry; I will personally deliver the job … Alfred my main man …”

I smiled and wondered if Mr Akpan (not his real name) had a duplicate in Abuja. Lol!

The next morning as we exchanged pleasantries at the gate; I giggled mischievously as I remembered what I overheard the night before. (He stared at me with the ‘are you ok’ look!)

Q1 – Is that a lie? Is it harmful?

Before you respond, think well! Do not point your forefinger at Mr Akpan because the other four fingers will likely be pointing back at you.

Often, we manipulate information to calm an aggrieved client or even manage a relationship. Or how do we classify the promises we make to a whining or a child throwing tantrums in a bid to get him quiet.

For some, answering this question can be debatable. 

When I was much younger, a grand aunt used to say “the lie is not harmful dear” whenever I caught or heard her lying. When I grew older I knew better and took a stand.

 Harmful lie + not harmful lie = LIE

I surmised that Mr Akpan did not want anyone eavesdropping that was why he stepped out to answer that call in the first place.

Q 2 – If it is a lie and it is not harmful, why did Mr Akpan step out?

Often, we desire to be the ‘perfect’ role model to our children and the people in our immediate sphere of influence. Who then gets deceived, when like Mr Akpan we step out of other’s ‘earshot’ to tell a lie or conveniently use a lie as a cover up for each constraints we encounter.

Some people opine that some ‘lies’ are necessary, as such it cannot be judged as ‘bad’. In fact, they believe that when a lie helps salvage a bad situation, prevents another query being sandwiched in your personal file or even help ‘save face’ before your wife and kid(s), it is okay.

The truth is – “there is no excuse for a wrong deed”!

Take a stand! A good and enduring one!!

Our stand to uphold the truth at all times will in turn impact on our relationships, children and the world.
Let’s be difference we so desire!
Let’s do it right for the sake of the next generation!!

Speak the truth at all times and it shall make you free. 

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  • Reply
    Trendy Mother
    September 24, 2013 at 9:18 pm

    @Anonymous 1:47, White lies?????

    ummmh! God help us.

  • Reply
    September 24, 2013 at 8:47 am

    Liesss… Some call it white lies which they say is not harmful… As long as it is not what happened exactly its a lie.

  • Reply
    September 20, 2013 at 8:59 am


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